oh no (what's this?)
by The Crownless Queen
Summary: "Alya finally realizes that enough is enough, and that Marinette's secret or not, she has to do something or she'll go mad when she wakes up one day to find the link to a clearly amateurish video in the Ladyblog's askbox showing Adrien bringing Ladybug flowers." Part 4 of the Alya knows series.


**oh no (what's this?)**

Alya finally realizes that enough is enough, and that Marinette's secret or not, she has to do something or she'll go mad when she wakes up one day to find the link to a clearly amateurish video in the Ladyblog's askbox showing Adrien bringing Ladybug flowers.

The clip is longer than she expects it to be. It starts well after the sun has set and whoever's holding the camera's obviously got shaking hands (in excitement or something else, Alya can't quite tell), but the quality is otherwise good. You can't hear the cameraman's (woman? person?) breathing though, which is something it took Alya an embarrassing amount of time to master when she films her own clips of Paris' two superheroes.

Adrien's and Marinette's voices are perfectly clear though, even if they don't say much.

Alya's eyes are glued to the screen, and she watches the video three times in a row before she actually starts to believe what she's seeing.

The clip starts innocuously enough, with Ladybug standing alone on a rooftop and surveilling the street beneath her.

 _(Alya suspects whoever's filming to live nearby, and probably at least three floors up, to be able to shoot the scene so clearly)_

Barely a few seconds in, there's some weird sound Alya can't quite make out – probably the distance – and Ladybug's head jerks around, suddenly focused. Her hand itches toward her yo-yo, and it's always so interesting to see those reflexes her best-friend has developed in action, but instead of the fight Alya's expecting, Ladybug completely relaxes and swings down on the street, where Adrian has just walked in the line of sight of the camera holding a beautiful bouquet of white and pink roses.

It's weird to hear Adrien stutter – Alya's sure he's blushing too, but that's only because she knows how he acts and reacts around Marinette so well by now – after spending so long holding him at a higher standard than everyone else (consequences of spending time with Marinette, who spent at least half an hour a day explaining why Adrien was perfect to anyone willing to hear, ie. usually Alya), but that's what he does.

"H-here, these are for you," he blurts out, pushing the flowers forward until they're nearly right in Ladybug's face, and thank the gods that they've at least told each other their secret because this scene is awkward enough now, Alya doesn't want to imagine how bad it could be.

 _(but she does anyway, because after months of witnessing just how willfully blind about each other her two friends can be, she thinks it's pretty much a miracle something like this didn't happen earlier)_

Ladybug's obviously surprised but also very pleased as she accepts the flowers much more gracefully than Marinette ever would have – and now that Adrien and Marinette are officially dating, Alya's had plenty of opportunity to witness this particular reaction of her friend's.

"Thank you, these are lovely," her best friend says with a smile that anyone can hear in her voice as she leans in to smell the flowers, "and they do smell wonderfully nice."

Adrien's next words are spoken so quickly it's a wonder Alya manages to understand them, but she thankfully has plenty of experiences with Marinette's word vomit to help her there. "Really? I mean, of course they do, they're great, that's why I chose them, because you're great and… I should probably let you get back to work, protecting Paris and such…"

Adrien rubs the back of his neck and laughs nervously.

"You probably should, yeah," Ladybug answers, and that's definitely the tone Marinette uses when she's humoring you.

The two teenagers seem to do an awkward dance around each other before Adrien finally waves and vanish off screen.

Ladybug jumps back to the roof and like in a bad romance movie, Chat Noir appears not even a minute after.

 _(who exactly do they think this act fooled, Alya wonders, though she supposes that not everyone knows Marinette or Adrien as well as she does – and that's probably for the best, or Ladybug and Chat Noir's secret identities would have been revealed a long time ago)_

"Oh, flowers my Lady? Are those for me? I knew you couldn't resist me forever," Chat Noir greets his counterpart with, and though their faces are too far away to see Alya just knows he's wearing his cat-like grin again.

He leans in toward the flowers only for Ladybug to move out of the way and let him fall, and that's how Alya knows that her two friends are just playing around – why they feel the need to do this where they might be seen is another mystery entirely, especially considering how little time there was between Adrien's disappearance and Chat Noir's appearance, but well… They're teenagers.

"Paws off kitty, these are mine. I have an _admirer_ ," Ladybug teases. "Go get your own if you want some."

"Ah, but you know my heart only belongs to you my Lady," Chat Noir teases back, getting back up fluidly and bowing with flourish.

Ladybug scoffs dismissively, as is her habit, but Alya, who knows her, can read in her body language that she's enjoying this banter a lot more than she used to.

The video ends a handful of seconds later, when the two heroes launch themselves toward another rooftop, and then another, and another, until they're nothing more than a couple of pixels in the background.

When the video finishes for the third time, Alya leans back into her chair and rubs her temple. How can her friends be so brilliant and so stupid at the same time? There should seriously be some kind of law against this, because Alya knows that if people start seeing them interact out of and in costume, some of them will probably put all the pieces of the puzzle together.

The inhabitants of Paris can't _all_ be stupid after all, and though she doesn't know much about what her best friend has to deal with, Alya does know that there is at least one supervillain who'd be _very_ interested in knowing Ladybug and Chat Noir's secret identities.

Which means she has to do something. Somehow. Again.

 _(nobody warned her that being a sort of sidekick was this exhausting. The comic books always make it look much more glamorous, but really her friendship with Marinette should have come with warnings, like 'you'll love her, but don't get involved in the superheroing or she'll drive you mad)_

 _(well, too late for that)_

 **.x.**

It's a Saturday, which both explains how Marinette was able to be out so late – Alya has noticed that Ladybug and Chat Noir's rounds around Paris seem to always end at least an hour earlier than they do during week-ends or holidays – and gives Alya sometime before she has to see Marinette to figure out what she's going to do.

Because she has to do something, even if it's just showing Marinette the video. Alya knows the truth, but she's probably the only one apart from the two idiots concerned, and by Monday everyone in class will have seen it, and all _they_ know is that Adrien and Marinette are dating.

Knowing her best friend, Marinette would be entirely clueless about this, and when confronted with the video – like Alya knows she will be on Monday – she might slip up, or say something she'd regret. Someone – *cough* Chloe *cough* – will try to make it seem like Adrien isn't invested in their relationship, or who knows what else that little blonde tyrant might come up with, and it'd only end in drama.

At least now that Adrien and Marinette know about each other, Alya would be able to avoid the traditional moment where one half of the couple realizes that the other is keeping a secret, feels betrayed, ruins everything, wallows in pain for weeks before realizing that everything was just a misunderstanding and finally make up with their beloved after a stupidly romantic grand gesture.

With luck, they can even skip the grand gesture, there won't be any drama, and her two idiot friends will simply learn to keep their interactions normal.

Though this means that she needs another perspective, someone who could have an outsider's perspective and help her realize what she needs to say so that Alya herself doesn't accidentally reveals that she's in on her best friend's secret. Someone who'll be able to tell her if she's making a mountain of a molehill, or if she's right to be concerned. Someone who knows Marinette too, but who also knows enough about Adrien to help her understand how he might react.

That is to say, she needs to go on a date with Nino.

How lucky is it that they've already planned to meet later today?

 **.x.**

Alya meets up with Nino at a Starbuck's near her place – they've planned to take their coffee there before wandering a bit around Paris – and immediately presents him with the video.

Well, she does say hello first, her mother _has_ raised her to be polite, and Nino is her boyfriend and she really likes him, but this is kind of an emergency, and she knows he'll get it once he sees the video (if he hasn't already).

"Have you seen this?"

It turns out, Nino hasn't. Well, that's perfectly understandable. After all, not everyone can be as passionate ('no I'm not obsessed Nino') about Ladybug and her adventures as Alya.

He watches the small clip in silence, but Alya can see from his face that he's somewhat concerned. He's certainly confused at first, then disbelieving, and also mostly surprised – as well as exasperated, and Alya only recognize that feeling because she's been feeling it so often lately, what with Marinette's crazy Ladybug adventures – but there's concern there too, and it's unmistakable.

When the video ends, Alya shuts off her phone and tucks in back in her pocket, and crosses her arms on the table.

"So, what do you think we should do?" She asks pointedly. "I mean, clearly we have to do something here, since everyone will know by Monday for sure, and our best friends will probably be in the middle of it."

Nino moans pitifully, and he looks like he's definitely considering banging his head on the table. Instead, he clings to his coffee cup hard enough that Alya wouldn't be surprised to see the coffee overflow.

"Man, this is such a mess," he mumbles, leaning back on his chair. "I can't believe Adrien could have been this stupid. I mean, he can be a bit…"

"Dense?" Alya supplies helpfully, referring to the way he hadn't noticed how Marinette was totally in love with him until he was literally faced with the facts.

"Yeah, that," Nino laughs. "Don't take me wrong, I love the guy, he's my best friend and all, but sometimes… God, he's such an _idiot_ ," he sighs.

"Don't worry about that," Alya scoffs after a sip of coffee, "Marinette's the same. Sometimes she's even worse. I totally get it."

They share a commiserating look for a moment, before Alya speaks again.

"Anyway, this is going to look like Adrien's in love with Ladybug – or at least, that's what Chloe and her clique are going to say… You know how she still can't stand the idea that he's with Marinette now instead of her."

"As if Adrien would ever have dated her. Man, that girl's a harpy…" He pauses, and then winces. "You know, I'm pretty sure Adrien's actually in love with Ladybug…"

Alya bites back the ' _Trust me, I know'_ that wants to burst from her lips, and instead settles for, "Well he doesn't have a chance, I think Ladybug's dating Chat Noir. Plus, Adrien has Marinette."

This is such a weird sentence to say too. God, Marinette owes her so much for all the weirdness she's introduced into her life. Last year, it would never have occurred to Alya that her best friends would have two different relationships at the same time – to tell the truth, it still doesn't, as this is a very special case – though she guesses that the fact that it's with the same guy both makes it better and weirder.

When all of this is done, she's going to request her weight in chocolate, or in biscuits. Marinette's parents have a delicious cookie recipe after all, and there's nothing quite like chocolate to help her relax.

She is so lost in her thoughts that she almost doesn't have the time to duck as Nino chokes and spits back his mouthful of coffee toward her at her words.

Standing up, Alya hurries to tap him on the back until he gets his breathing back.

"Are you alright? Maybe you should try drinking not quite so quickly?" She chastises softly, biting her cheek not to laugh at his misfortune.

"I'm fine," Nino replies with a dark glare, his eyes red and his voice still raspy. "Just something that went down the wrong way." He looks slightly bewildered.

"Obviously," Alya says, smiling.

"Laugh it up, go ahead. Your poor boyfriend's dying in front of you, and you can only think of mocking him. What did I ever do to you to deserve such inhuman treatment?"

Laughing, Alya slaps him on the arm. "Come on, you were hardly dying. Plus, I went in to help immediately, so you can hardly complain."

"Of course I can, you just _hit_ me."

"Please, if this is what you call _hitting_ … It was hardly a love tap."

"If this is love, I'd hate to see what you'd call hate, girl," he quips back, but he's smiling again, so Alya takes it as a win.

"I could always kiss it better," Alya smirks, timing it just right for when he's once again taking a sip of his coffee.

Five minutes later, she's stopped laughing and he's finished wiping the table clean – or well, as clean as he can with flimsy paper towels, and they resume their conversation.

"Anyway, you didn't tell me what made you react like that," Alya starts with, because she's naturally curious, but also because she recognizes the shifty look in his eyes.

It's the 'I'm keeping a secret, and it's bigger than just me' look, and Alya knows it because she's perfected it weeks ago.

Nino clears his throat and shifts on his chair, clearly trying to buy himself time. "Ah… Err, that is, I mean… It's… Uhm, complicated?" He finally says, wincing.

Alya nearly laughs again at the look on his face. "Cat got your tongue?" She teases, smirking.

And then she winks, deliberately, and because she can.

Nino looks like he's been struck.

"You mean you _know_ too?" He whispers furiously, glancing around to make sure no one can overhear them, which is probably good thinking even though Alya's ninety-nine percent sure no one here cares about anything other than their daily intake of coffee.

"About your best friend's leather fetish?"

Had he been drinking something, Nino would have chocked again, Alya's sure of it. (Un)fortunately, he seems to have learned his lesson. "Adrien doesn't have a leather fetish," he retorts, offended.

Alya just raises an eyebrow at him. Because really, his costume kind of does scream that.

Nino deflates. "Okay, so maybe he does, in fact, have a slight – _very_ slight – leather problem. But everyone has those, and at least he doesn't, err…"

"Have more luck than sense?"

"-have more luck than sense, _thank you_ , like _your_ best friend," he rants. "I mean, she is kind of lucky, right?" He adds, almost sounding worried.

"Marinette does seem to have the best kind of luck lately," Alya agrees, a smile on her lips.

Nino groans, his eyes widening in understanding. "You know, this explains so much, it's not even funny anymore."

"Well, it kind of is. Sometimes. The romantic drama wasn't, but we'll be able to mock them from the sidelines for _years_ one day, and I'm definitely telling the story to all of their children."

"Yeah, somehow that still doesn't seem like a fair trade. Do you know how much I worried for that idiot before I realized why I could never find him during any crisis?" Nino whines.

"Probably as much as I worried for Marinette," Alya shrugs. "If it helps, I promised myself I'd have her give me my weight on chocolate one day. I deserve at least that."

"Yeah, Adrien definitely owes me something good too. He better have the best apology ever," he fumes.

He freezes, and Alya knows he's suddenly realized _it_ when he groans again.

"Oh god, this means the reason why we couldn't pair them up was because they already loved each other, but _not_. How is that even possible outside of the television?"

"I have no idea," Alya answers, "but somehow they managed pretty well. It was _horrible_. Did you know that they didn't even realize who they were? Like, I figured it out before them, and I had like, only second-hand accounts half the time. How blind were they?"

"You mean you actually knew all this time? Then why did you have me try to get Adrien to date Marinette?"

"Yes. And I didn't lie, I did think it'd be a good idea for him to consider Marinette as a potential love interest instead of staying stuck on Ladybug," Alya answers drily, and there is definitely something exciting at finally being able to have this kind of conversation with someone who knows too.

Nino blinks, hard, and chucks back the last of his coffee. "You know, this sentence shouldn't sound so weird."

"Trust me, I know," she sighs, reaching out with her hand for Nino's.

They stay silent for a while, just holding hands and letting the sounds of the café wash over them.

Finally, Nino speaks again. "So, what did you want to do about that video thing?"

"I have no idea," Alya admits. "I don't think they knew they were being, you know, filmed, and I don't think Marinette knows about the video now, and I definitely don't want her to be surprised by it on Monday, but…" She sighs again. "I just don't know. I just want to find a way to tell her to be careful without actually _telling_ her…"

"Why didn't you anyway? _Tell_ her I mean."

"Why didn't you?" Aly asks back, an eyebrow arched.

"You have a point," Nino admits with a smile. "I guess I just don't want things to change if they don't have to," he continues, shrugging his shoulders. "Still, that doesn't mean you can't tell her that you think Ladybug was being reckless, for like, accepting a stranger's gift. Who knows," he adds with a smirk, "he might have been yet another akuma. It's not that far off from what you do on the Ladyblog sometimes, and anyway, she's your friend, she'll listen."

Alya stares, taken aback. Suddenly, she moves, throwing herself forward and catching Nino in a kiss that leaves the both of them breathless.

"You are a genius!"

Their date is much more normal after that.

 **.x.**

In the end, Alya just texts Marinette to watch the video after her date ends, and she busies herself tidying up her room a bit as she waits for her friend's answer.

She doesn't have to wait long.

She barely has the time to make a couple of rounds in her room (Alya likes to visualize what she has to do before she starts doing it, which is helpful when she actually has the time to tidy up, but unfortunately is more of a waste of time than anything else when she doesn't, though it does help kill time) before her phone buzzes with a panicked message from Marinette.

 _ **WHAT?!**_ The text message reads.

A few seconds later, her phone vibrates again, and then again.

 _ **How did this**_ _**happen?**_

 _ **I mean, of course I knew Adrien was going to see Ladybug, but why is there a video of it?**_

 _ **And why is this stupid video titled 'Trouble brewing for Ladynoir?'? And why does it have so many viewings?**_

Alya chuckles as she starts to type her answers.

 **Like it? I found this in my inbox… Pretty sure some kid opened their windows and saw it happen. Maybe they wanted to see the stars, or maybe they were Ladybug-watching… ^^**

 _ **Ladybug-watching? What is that?**_

 **The name's kind of self-explanatory. She's a hero you know, people like to see her… From what I gathered it's kind of like bird-watching, only with more chance of seeing heroics. I get some of the pictures for the Ladyblog from them too, some of them are pretty skilled.**

Alya lies back on her bed as she waits for Marinette's answer. Imagining her friend's flustered reactions about this discussion is kind of hilarious too, and definitely the best thing about this situation.

 **As for the title,** she types, **I think people are assuming that Adrien's trying to make a move on Ladybug. Maybe they like him better than Chat Noir too, or maybe they just chose that title to catch the eye. It's what newspapers do to sell copies too, you know, and seeing from the number of views I'd say it's working ;)**

Her phones vibrates again.

 _ **I can't believe people stand around waiting for Ladybug to swing by. :/ o.O**_

 **Hey, how is that any different from what I do? I do kind of try to chase her around, you know. Doesn't always work, but well… No risk, no gain.**

 _ **Still…**_

 **I know.**

 **Anyway, you said you knew Adrien would go to Ladybug. You ok with that?**

This time, the answer takes a little longer.

 _ **Sure, it's fine. I mean, she does a lot for Paris and it's normal for him to want to thank her.**_

Which is basically the closest to a politically correct answer Marinette could get, especially if she didn't want to give anything away.

Too bad Alya already knows.

Not even bothering to bite back the smile on her lips, Alya replies.

 **So you're not jealous at all?**

 _ **Of course not!**_ Come the immediate answer. _**Don't be ridiculous.**_

 **You know that's what Chloe'll hint at on Monday, right?**

 _ **Ugh, Chloe… :(**_

 **Poor Marinette, having to handle her arch-enemy in two days :p How will you survive?**

 _ **Don't joke about that. Or she'll find another way to make my life miserable…**_

 **Lol**

 **Anyway, I wanted to tell you that maybe you should tell Adrien to be careful? Like if he wants to associate with Ladybug and all, it could be dangerous. I know I don't act like it, because it's fun, but it could be dangerous for him if people thought he could help them get to Ladybug.**

 **No offense though, but I thought I should tell you.**

Even if she has to bite into her pillow to muffle her laughter, Alya is perfectly serious. She loves the Ladyblog, and she'd never give it up, but she's learned how dangerous it could be a long time ago. Even with Ladybug's Lucky Charm somehow restoring everything back to normal after an akuma attack, Alya knows it's only a matter of time before the mysterious Hawkmoth takes the matter into his own hands and leaves his lair.

And who knows if the Lucky Charm will work the same way against him?

It still seems kind of hypocritical to lecture her best friend on safety while frequenting superheroes, but if it works… Well, that's the most important thing, isn't it?

Marinette doesn't answer her for a while, but when she comes back from dinner, her phone flashes with a new message.

All it says is _**Thanks, I'll tell him**_ **,** but that's all Alya needs to know that her message has been received.

And that makes her day.

 **.x.**

There are no more Adrien/Ladybug videos after that, nor Marinette/Chat Noir's, thankfully, but as if to make up for that fact, the number of pictures of Ladybug and Chat Noir taken together multiplies.

It gets to the point where Alya can barely muster the will to open her inbox because of all the photos and videos she knows she'll have to sift through, but she does it anyway.

It tastes almost like revenge when she saves the most embarrassing ones and sends them to her friends – Marinette first, but she adds Adrien and Nino to the list soon enough.

And if Marinette has taken to sending her suspicious looks sometimes when she thinks Alya's not looking, well, it's just about time, isn't it?


End file.
